Essay by PaperNerd ContributorCollege, Undergraduate October 2001

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VITALITY AFFECTS & ATTUNEMENT Vitality affects and attunements are concepts that seem clear, yet it is very difficult to fully comprehend the concepts in a lecture or by reading about it. When you actually try to look for these concepts in real life, you understand them better. I would like to relate the concepts of vitality affects and attunement to an event that I experienced this weekend.

To give you the background of the event, I was in Boston this weekend. My friend and I met up with some people and went out for dinner. After dinner, we went for a ride and then we went to their college and sat up all night playing and talking. This seems like a very regular routine for college students, but something happened that night that not only affected my life, but it made me understand the concepts of vitality affects and attunement.

In the group of people, there was one guy whom I found attractive, but I did not know him and coincidentally we were not introduced either. When I first saw him or met him at the college with my friends, our eyes were on each other. It was like a "hello" but without words. As the night went on, there were little movements, such as choosing the seat at the restaurant or choosing the car for the ride, that made me realize that I was in attunement with the guy, yet we had not talked a word to each other. We sat next to each other at the restaurant, and joined in with the group conversation but at the same time, there was a silent conversation between us. It is very hard for me to explain, but it was like I was "dancing with him" the whole night. He would rush in front of me to open doors, laugh at my jokes even when no one else did, and take my coat when we went indoors. These energy burst that I saw in him reminded me of a child, and the "dynamic language" was like a vitality affect. I felt that we were in a "match". He knew how I was feeling and I knew how he was feeling, but we had not uttered a single word to each other. I felt as though I was in "absolute attunement or intensity" with him and I know that he was feeling the same. We only had met, yet we felt like we could read each other, understand each other.

Once we reached the college in boston, we played truth and dare. He was dared to seduce me without words. Since he could not back out of it, he did. Everyone in the room was cracking up, but the two of us were in another world. I could not hear anyone. I could only feel his body next to mine, and his deep breathing under my chin. I wanted to hold him to keep him there, but the game continued and our eye contact also continued.

Finally, morning arrived and everyone was tired so we decided to sleep and drive back in the afternoon. Ironically, the guy's roommate was my best friend Varun. I ended up sleeping in their room with Varun, the guy, and two other friends. We all slept on the floor, there was no sexual contact, we slept like friends or more like family. Everyone fell asleep, except the guy and I. I could feel that he was watching me so I opened my eyes and I saw his beautiful brown eyes on me. We looked into each other's eyes for a very long time, and then we both got up and left the room.

"Hi, by the way, I am Kunal." He told me when we were in the lounge. "Hi, I am Rahima." I replied. The conversation followed, and we discovered that we both had fallen for each other. This has never happened to me or to him. It was as if, there was a wavelength and we were both attuned to the same frequency. We talked all morning, and when our friends woke up they were surprised that the two of us were still up and talking. I said goodbye to him and left for Mount Holyoke.

He showed up here on Monday and now we are going out. This relationship to me and to him is very special, because we do not need word to express what we are feeling. I feel like whenever I am with him "I am dancing with an angel". Sitting here, writing this paper, I feel that I clearly understand what vitality affects and attunements are and how they work in the "real" world. The weekend made me feel good, he made me feel good. There was clearly a communion between us, we shared a sense of closeness that I have not shared with anyone as yet.